|By Suzy Fontes, Mangalore [ Published Date: February 16, 2006 ]|
For the love of Mike, I cannot understand this obsession with love. Everything happens, is happening or will happen, because of love or lack of love. Seemingly so...
Goodness, one would think love is all that is needed to make this world work. As if it is love that makes this earth rotate and revolve around sun; as if it is love that makes the trees sway or even flowers bloom.
Love is an overrated word. Full stop.
Sorry, I beg to alter that full stop. Make it a loud pause.
Inhale deeply and consider the proposition. Don’t you just feel that love is indeed a hyped up emotion? Something that needs to be brought down from its mighty pedestal?
There is a gross misrepresentation of facts and emotions here. An out of context obsession with this four-letter word. As if love is in everything. Even in something as mundane as cooking or as sublime as peace. Love, love and love…
Why...? Please don’t look at me for answers. I have none. This squishy emotion has held even strong-headed people in its maddening grips. And who am I to question its power. Anger, hatred, care, kindness...can take a flying one. Love is not gonna budge. It is here to stay.
There is so much of it in movies.. Wow, as if people never tire of love. The Bollywood movies have it splashed in the title too.
Seriously, can love be so much in demand?
I know for sure there is no love in all the promotions one sees in the office hierarchy. Now come on, how can there be love when the chap who got promoted got it only because he knew how to push his case? It is all about being glib and gabby. And there will be no love at all between the one who got promoted and one who presumed it was his turn... That’s a volatile situation there.
And even when one talks about love for love’s sake, it is uncanny how that is what is least present among all the other ingredients. A dash of bravery, a hint of infatuation, a pinch of ego, scoops of good looks... All combine to make love?
Several years ago, when I was still a little girl, love was the neighbourhood buzzword. Not the neighbourly kind of love this – something totally filmy. As if a spell was cast on the little town, young girls and boys routinely `fell’ in love. There was everything working for them – the proximity of their homes, the relative uniformity in the ages and it happened.
There was this young couple. The only stumbling block in the path towards marriage was their religious difference. That was a big taboo. Am sure it still is, in some places....
Their clandestine meetings grew feisty and their proclamations of love became public. Let me add that in the absence of telly to keep one occupied or a handy means of transport to take one outdoors, entertainment was quite restricted. Gossiping helped kill time and there was nothing to beat something as spicy as a love affair between young couples. Extra marital affairs got more points though.
Well, so it happened. Their 'love’ affair became a public affair and that goaded them to prove their strong feelings for each other. And in one of those love-struck moments of mania they decided to jump into a well. They jumped to the gasps of some passersby. 'Goodness, whatever is happening to this generation…’ an old lady moaned, to demonstrate how in her time young boys and girls fell in love only after marriage!
The duo survived that jump – curiously, they had decided to jump into a dry well, which wasn’t very deep – and promptly got married in the court.
It didn’t take this young couple long to realize how incredibly overrated love is. Well, long does seem exaggerated. It took them six months. Before their first child was born they were fighting in the streets like sworn enemies.
I can’t ever forget what an ex colleague ones said. 'After so many years of marriage, there is no love, yaar. Only friendship...’
All this, and yet I go moony-eyed every time I see love on the telly and can’t help but inscribe love at the end of my letters to family and friend. So much for this overrated business.
And wasn’t it love that made me write the lines below...
Will you shed tears on my grave?
Place flowers on my tomb,
Think of all the wonderful times we had together…
And then remember the many not so wonderful days spent and
Say, 'well it is god’s wish’ and walk away?
Will you clear the shrubs growing on my grave?
Rub your hands along its length,
Hoping it would soothe me like your caresses did?
Will you wonder where I am as you stare at my grave?
Am I watching over you?
Do I feel the tears stinging your eyes?
Do I read your mind like you said I could?
Or would you just bow your head as worldly matters take over you?
Will you sit on my grave
Longing to place your head on it..
Reminiscing the softness of my lap
As it cushioned your burdened head?
Will you wonder why I left you halfway through
Mysteriously, without giving any reasons,
Like I used to when I switched off if stress made me grave.
Will you answer me now
If I ask you what is causing the crease on your brow
Or will you just brush it aside
Saying 'nothing’, like you used to with that faraway look?
Will you love another like you loved me...?