Remembering Loved Ones Who Have Departed the Earth, but Not Our Hearts on All Souls Day!
Mangaluru: Catholic families across Mangaluru parishes gathered last evening (1 Nov) and also this morning (2 Nov) at area cemeteries to pay tribute to loved ones who have died. Catholic Church celebrations for All Saints’ Day fall on or around the actual day. The observance honours both official Saints and others who have lived good lives. Today is “All Souls’ Day when believers pray that souls in purgatory make it to heaven. Though its origins lie with the Catholic Church, other Christian denominations mark the holiday by reading the names of congregation members who have died over the past year.
Blossom Fernandes along with her children Oshanie Fernandes and Oshan Fernandes at her Husband Oscar’s Tomb at St Patrick’s Church Cemetary, Bengaluru
All Souls’ Day is a celebration to remember those who have died (in particular one’s relatives). It always falls on November 2 and is preceded by All Saints’ Day on November 1. People traditionally visit the graves of deceased relatives during this time. Known liturgically as the “Commemoration of All the Faithful Departed”, All Souls’ Day is often seen as a continuation and extension of the All Saints’ Day celebrations conducted the day before. While All Saints’ Day is dedicated to those who are in heaven. The custom of placing lit candles on the graves of deceased relatives on All Saints’ Day often continues into All Souls’ Day.
William D’souza (Prop: Globe Travels) with his sisters and Bro-in-law at his Mother’s Tomb at Bendore Church Cemetery
Ms Anitha Lobo, wife of Late Dr Norbert Lobo (HoD of Economics, St Aloysius College) with relatives/Friends at Bendore Church cemetery
After the celebration of All Saints Day, the church remembers all our departed brothers and sisters and prays for them in a special way. The dead cannot pray for themselves and they need our prayers. Our prayers are the only way we still remain connected to our near and dear ones who have gone before us. The Catechism of the Catholic Church teaches us that, “Death is the end of man’s earthly pilgrimage, of the time of grace and mercy which God offers him so as to work out his earthly life in keeping with the divine plan, and to decide his ultimate destiny.
All who die in God’s grace and friendship, but are still imperfectly purified, are indeed assured of their eternal salvation; but after death, they undergo purification, so as to achieve the holiness necessary to enter the joy of heaven. The Church gives the name Purgatory to this final purification of the elect, which is entirely different from the punishment of the damned. It is for these that we pray on this special day, that God may be merciful to them and grant them eternal reward.
Terrence D’Souza (Prop: A R D’Souza & Sons) with family members paying homage to deceased family members at Bendore Cemetery
Team Mangalorean was at St Sebastian Church, Bendore on 1 November evening and this morning (2 Nov) at St Francis Xavier Church on ‘All Souls Day’. The clergy prayed for the departed faithful during the masses that were offered in the morning and in the evening. The cemetery of Bendore Church was blessed after the evening mass by the parish priest Fr Vincent Monteiro, joined by the other Church clergy, Fr Denzil Lobo; Fr Lawrence Cutinha Fr Vivian Rodrigues- all three Assistant Parish Priests; and Fr Arun Lobo-the Principal of Padua College, Mangaluru.
Fr Vincent Monteiro, the parish priest officiated the mass and urged the faithful on the importance of praying for the dead. In his homily, he said, “Our deeds here on earth determine where we will be after we die. As Jesus says in the gospel of Matthew ‘What you have done to the least of my brother or sister, that you have done to me’. We are called to lead good lives here on earth, in the love and service of our brothers and sisters. While we pray for our departed we also remember their good works, their lives of faith and service, and their good example and pray that the Lord not look at their sins but at the good that they have done and grant them eternal life,” added Fr Bonaventure
After the mass, a small prayer service was held at the cemetery. The parish priest led the prayer, especially praying for those buried in Bendore cemetery., All the clergy of the parish joined in the prayer, and the choir sang hymns to help the congregation pray. The priests later blessed the cemetery, helped by youth volunteers, trying their best to reach all the possible graves and blessing them by sprinkling Holy Water on them and the family members who had come to pray for them.
After the celebration of All Saints Day, the church remembers all our departed brothers and sisters and prays for them in a special way. The dead cannot pray for themselves and they need our prayers. Our prayers are the only way we still remain connected to our near and dear ones who have gone before us. The Catechism of the Catholic Church teaches us that, “Death is the end of man’s earthly pilgrimage, of the time of grace and mercy which God offers him so as to work out his earthly life in keeping with the divine plan, and to decide his ultimate destiny.
Students of Lourdes Central CBSE School, Bejai pray for Late George Fernandes (Former Union Minister) at Bejai Cemetery
On All Souls Day, we not only remember the dead, but we apply our efforts, through prayer, almsgiving, and the Mass, to their release from Purgatory. There are two plenary indulgences attached to All Souls Day, one for visiting a church and another for visiting a cemetery. (The plenary indulgence for visiting a cemetery can also be obtained every day from November 1-8, and, as a partial indulgence, on any day of the year.) While the actions are performed by the living, the merits of the indulgences are applicable only to the souls in Purgatory.
Family members and close friends visited the cemeteries this past week, some to clean the tombs in preparation for the celebrations. Tombs at the Catholic church cemeteries were adorned with new silk flowers/fresh flowers, bouquets and candles. Susan, who belongs to Bejai Parish cleans the graves of her family members once every two months. She says “We honor the saints that are in heaven. We remember the dead and we pray for them. We also need to keep the tombs of our beloved ones clean too. I feel sad when I see the dilapidated conditions of some of the tombs. “This morning Susan was out at St Francis Xavier Church-Bejai Cemetery freshening up the flowers by the grave of her sister, and she remembers her sister every day, especially her “bubbly” personality. “Whenever you see her, she would laugh and always have something good to say. She wasn’t going to die, she was going to go on forever and ever,” Susan said.
Bridgettine Convent Sisters paying respect to their deceased Sisters of the Convent at Bendore Church cemetery
Gregory had come along with his wife Rita to offer prayers and floral tributes to his dad and other loved ones, Speaking to Mangalorean.com, he said, “When I close my eyes I see them; When I open my eyes I miss them. I keep myself busy with the things I do but every time I pause, I still think of our loved ones whom we miss a lot. Have you ever missed someone so much that even the thought of them made you burst into tears? I miss them. A little too much, a little too often and a little more every day, my dear loved ones”.
Team Mangalorean also interacted with a young teenage girl at Bendore Cemetery who had come along with her aunt to pay respect to her beloved dad. who had passed away at a very young age of 49, due to lung cancer. “I loved my dad very much. I was his very favourite daughter, he always cared for me, loved me and gave me whatever I wanted. Losing him was the greatest tragedy in my life. My arms may not be able to reach him, but he is holding my heart. My dad was the most encouraging, inspiring, and positive person. His words will live on in my heart. He lives on in my heart. I love him so much more than any limitations that our human vocabulary puts on emotions. I miss my dad, I love him,” said Marsha with tears in her eyes.
Simple and Thoughtful floral tribute to my Mom & Dad at Bejai Church Cemetery
This morning, I visited and paid respect to the tomb of my dad and mom, George and Magdalene D’Souza, who both share the same tomb at Bejai Church. Since they both passed away while I was in the USA, I feel sorry to say that due to my work schedule, new job and short time leave provision, I wasn’t able to attend their funeral. I know that they have forgiven me, and are looking at me from heaven, showering their love and blessings on me. For their love, care and dedication towards me, I dedicate the following thought-provoking poem to my parents. I miss them very much. If I had a chance to relive my years with them again, I would have thought of their needs more and made time to visit them more often than I did –
A day does not go by without thinking of you.
I think of the past and I feel happy and sad.
You both worked hard to take care of us.
My two brothers (Joe and Rudy) and I had fun growing up.
Before I knew it you were both very old.
I wish I had spent more time with you.
You gave all your time, love and care to us.
But I was too busy to even visit you two.
Now that both of you are dead and buried,
I visited your grave and thought of the past.
What I would not give to see you again.
I wish I could go back to the past.
I would spend every day with you two.
I would give you my time and my care.
To make sure that you were happy and well.
Just like you did with my brothers and me.