‘Survivors are Poor Starters, but Strong Finishers’- USA Advocate & Survivor Harold D’Souza
- ‘Survivors are Poor Starters, but Strong Finishers’- USA Advocate-Public Speaker & ‘Human-Trafficking’ Survivor Harold D’Souza, a Mangaluru origin from Bajpe, and alumnus of St Aloysius College, Mangaluru during his talk on “Human Trafficking Across the Globe” at LCRI Hall-St Aloysius College, Mangaluru on Wednesday, 27 November 2019.
Mangaluru: “Happy to be here in my hometown-Mangaluru, and feels proud to deliver my speech on Human-Trafficking at my Alma Mater (St Aloysius College), to a large gathering of young students,” said Advocate, Public Speaker and Human Trafficking Survivor prior to his talk. Harold D’Souza is on a tour of India to try to warn other potential victims and bring awareness of Human Trafficking, and Mangaluru was one among the Indian cities of his tour.
Harold D’Souza seen with his wife, Dancy and two sons-Bradly and Rohan
It’s been more than 16 years since Harold D’Souza migrated to the United States from India for a better life, only to become a victim of human trafficking. In the time since D’Souza and his family gained their freedom, he has become an outspoken champion for other victims of modern-day slavery. Now he’s taking his advocacy a step further with his new book named “Frog in a Well”, and a month-long trip to his home country of India, where he hopes to warn others so they don’t fall victim to the same false promises he did. “I want to educate them,” D’Souza said. “It’s better to be safe than sorry and prevention is better than cure.”
D’Souza’s new book, called “Frog in a Well: Turning obstacles to opportunities,” is filled with quotes he has written to inspire victims and survivors of human trafficking to overcome their trauma and find strength in their experiences. Proceeds from the book will help cover the cost of his trip to India. He also has launched a GoFundMe campaign to raise money for the effort.
Narrating his story Harold D’Souza said, “I moved to Greater Cincinnati, Ohio-USA from India in 2003 based on the promise that I would be hired as a development manager for a local manufacturing company. I was told that I would earn as much as $75,000 per year – a small fortune compared to my pay in India. But the day I and my wife, (Dancy) arrived, my employer, picked us up from the airport and took us to work at an Indian restaurant that has since been closed. That was the start of 19 months of 15-hour workdays without pay. Our sons, Bradly and Rohan arrived in Cincinnati a few months later after completing the school year in India”.
“Before long, I began to feel like a failure as a father, husband and provider. I completely lost my voice and contemplated suicide. Finally, my wife, Dancy confronted our employer, but our efforts were in vain. Our employer threatened us that he would get us arrested and jailed, and even get deported, if we pressurize our demands for our pending wages. When it became clear that the employer had no intention of ever paying us, we summoned our courage and lodged a complaint with the police. But I survived from the Human-Trafficking ordeal, and it was like Moving from death to life. It took me years to regain my voice. But I can say that failure is the path to success, and I am living a better life now after those horrifying experiences under my first employer”
“You need to be empowered and believe in yourself. The day I believed in myself I succeeded. Mine was an arranged marriage, where we both believed in commitment, responsibility and togetherness. With Trust, Faith, Promise and American Dream, I migrated to the USA. Even though I became a victim of Human-Trafficking, I also became a survivor. One thing in Human-trafficking I learned was that You get arrested, You get handcuffed, You get jailed, and chances are that you may get deported, because these perpetrators are rich, and are capable of doing anything”.
“But never lose faith, because faith led me to success. When your faith is deep, there is no reason to fear the perpetrators. You learn from mistakes, but try not to repeat the mistakes. If you face problems or get depressed, don’t lose hope and take the extreme step of committing suicide. Suicide or silence is not an option or choice. If a victim or survivor dies, it is a murder, not a suicide. Try to overcome your hurdles and determine to live and not to die. Remember, if you come to the USA legally, you are safe, but if you enter the USA illegally, you will be in hell? Never go to agents to seek entry into the US for a better life and job- they will totally cheat you- and many have faced bad experiences dealing with agents, with fake promises”.
“Focus on your life first, and since you are still young, don’t jump fast in having a boyfriend or a girlfriend at such young stage- wait till the right time comes to pick your partner. I am happy to have a nice and God-fearing family- like they say that a Family that prays together, stays together- such is my family. Survivors are poor starters, but strong finishers. All victims are human beings, but perpetrators treat the victims like commodities. Making a mistake is not a mistake, making no mistake is a mistake, repeating a mistake is a big mistake, and learning from your mistake to empower other victims to live a happy life is not a mistake”.
“In survivors life healing does not mean the trauma never existed. It means the trauma no longer controls our life. In a victims life, the time never ticks. Every second is like a minute. Every minute is like an hour. Every hour is like a day. Every day is like a month and every month is like a year. Fear should be on the ‘Perpetrators’, not the Victims’. The best and most beautiful moments in the life of a ‘Survivor” is to experience their kids prosper with freedom- and I am happy that both my sons-Bradly and Rohan are doing good in academics and other co-curricular activities, and they have the most freedom”.
“Survivors do not have the time, money or resources but they have the heart, passion and purpose to uplift victims- and that’s what I am doing at the moment. A victims life is like a “Frog in a Well”. Never underestimate the power of a survivor. Perpetrator’s death threats can never separate a survivor from his goals because if the survivor dies, his kids will accomplish his mission- and I know my sons will follow this mission. Every survivor has his or her own beauty, but not everyone can see it. When you save one victim, you save one survivor, but when you prosecute one perpetrator you save hundreds of victims. Every survivor has a painful story, but every painful story has a happy ending, like mine. Accept the pain and get ready for happiness”.
“Survivors will swim through storms, slavery, struggles, stigma, shame, sorrow, but even after success, they will not “STOP”. Look, listen, learn, laugh and love with every survivor. Survivors sharpen society, and survivors will save society from slavery. Together we will make a difference in this world to end modern-day slavery. Survivors’ failure and success should not be measured by their fall, but by how fast survivors pick themselves up. When a snake and mongoose fight, the mongoose always wins. Similarly, in perpetrators and survivors battle, the survivors win. Law of nature. Honesty prevails. Victim-survivors…Rise -fight -Victory is yours”- said Harold D’Souza during his elaborate talk on Human-Trafficking.
It is learnt that in 2015, Harold had become such an outspoken advocate for other survivors that then-President of USA Barack Obama appointed Harold to the United States Advisory Council on Human Trafficking. He has continued to serve on the council under the present US President Donald Trump. D’Souza also is the co-founder of Eyes Open International, a nonprofit organisation that focuses on preventing human trafficking through research-informed by survivors’ experiences.
During his trip, D’Souza said he plans to meet with India’s prime minister and encourage the formation of a council on human trafficking like the United States has. He also will be speaking at schools and churches and in front of any community group that will host him. He knows it’s an uphill battle. The International Labour Organization estimates that forced labour and human trafficking is a $150 billion industry worldwide with more than 40 million victims. And since Harold and Dancy D’Souza were victims of human trafficking when they moved to the United States, they now want to raise awareness by telling their story.
After retiring from his job at Cincinnati Children’s Hospital Medical Center earlier this year to focus on his advocacy efforts, Harold has become even more outspoken since both his sons have graduated from college. Speaking to Team Mangalorean Harold said, “I am determined to do everything in my power to make a difference. People forget that every survivor is either a father or a husband or a son. Same way if it’s a lady – a daughter, wife or mother. I don’t want any other family to go through that.”
“The height of candles may differ, but they yield the same brightness. It is not the perpetrators, but the survivors who shine in the society. Victims…Survivors ..Rise…Fight ..Victory is yours. And remember, do not tell GOD how big the STORM is in your life, but tell the STORM how big GOD is in your life”, added Harold D’Souza. Following his talk, there was a long interaction between him and the audience, mainly youth. Harold D’Souza was felicitated on the occasion. He was joined by his wife, Dancy, and his two sons, Bradly and Rohan.
Three students from St Aloysius College took a pledge, where student Abdulla said, “I will respect your rights regardless of who you are. I will uphold your rights even when I disagree with you”; Miss Anmay said, “When any one’s human rights are denied everyone’s rights are undermined. So I will stand Up”; and Miss Kavya said, “I will raise my voice. I will take action. I will use my right to stand up for your rights”. In his closing remarks, Fr Praveen Martis SJ, the Principal of St Aloysius College urged the students to raise their voices on human rights and fight against Human Trafficking, and follow in the footsteps of Harold D’Souza in raising the awareness on slavery and human trafficking.
The programme began with a prayer by the college choir, followed by the welcome address and briefing of the talk by Dr Shalini Aiyappa- Head of Dept of Psychology and one of the convener, while the vote of thanks was delivered by Dr Vincent Mascarenhas, the Dean of International Studies at SAC, and also the convener of the event. Miss Shivali Anil of II BA compered the programme, while Joel Fernandes, a BBA faculty was the coordinator.
